Corrupt-a-Wish

Granted. You lose a hand and both eyes.

I wish I could specify my times of waking and falling asleep with great exactitude, so that I could, for example, think "I want to fall asleep within the next minute and wake up completely at 7 a.m." and have it happen. This would not prevent me from waking up under other circumstances, such as if my fire alarm went off.


StraightFlame:

Granted, but someone hides a speaker in your house which plays random sound effects from Team Fortress 2 at random intervals whenever you're asleep. Oh, and it's also magic or something like that and it teleports away when you look at it, so you won't be able to find it at all.

Also, that utilities thing was a wording loophole kinda corruption, rather than a "but this happens which makes it not worth it" corruption. In other words, you got what i "assumed" you wished for, but not what you actually wished for, and i doubt you can call that a "free wish".

I wish you could close the YouTube app and still have the sound from the video play in the background.

Granted, but videos are now always followed by an unskippable, unmutable video ad.

I wish fibre-optic broadband was available in my area.

Granted, but it is too much expensive for a common user .

I wish Talps didn't forget the letter "a" in "granted".

Granted, but at the cost of his ability to remember to work on his games.

I wish I could replay whatever scenes of my life I want, whenever I wanted to.

You can, but you soon come to feel that all of those great moments of your life aren't as great as you recall. It's like listening to a song you love over and over again: sooner or later it stops being the most awesome thing ever composed and becomes part of your background. It's still a great song, but it's not exceptional any more. They were still great moments, but they aren't really that special after all.


I wish I could remember what I was gonna do today. I'm sure I had plans to work on... something... hmm...

Granted... 6 days too late.

I wish that Tale Smith forumgame would catch on.

Granted. However, every story going forward is Empath Smurf fanfiction. 

I wish I had a delicious burger and some yummy fries right now!

Granted. You are stranded on an island with no one else but you. The island is 2 meters squared. Around you is an ocean that is huge, with no ships nearby. In fact, ships don't even pass remotely. For no apparent reason (except that you wished for it) there's a table with a delicious burger and exactly 2 pieces of yummie fries besides it on a plate for you to enjoy.

I wish my holiday wouldn't end by the end of today.

Granted, you didn't have any holidays at all.

I wish for a biiiiiiiiiig teddy bear.

Your teddy bear is as big as Jupiter. It collapses under its own weight and sucks Neptune into itself, turning the planet a lovely shade of magenta.

I wish the old friend I'm trying to meet up with would pick a time we can meet and tell me about it, rather than constantly procrastinating.

Granted. Unfortunately you both get hit by a freak meteor about two minutes into your meeting.

I wish I was better at writing!

Granted; you can now write katakana flawlessly (therefore being "better at writing").

I wish i knew how to play Mao.

You understand how to play Mao! What you don't understand is how to keep four friends interested long enough to learn how to play Mao (since the aim of the game is to learn how to play...)

I wish to be capable of drawing KS cutscenes to a degree of quality that causes me satisfaction and enriches the plot of the associated level in such a way that the players of said level can appreciate them in the manner in which I intend for them to.