Thanks for posting a level! Always great to see new work.
* Technically, this level is very solid. I didn't see any wallswims or glitches or other breaks, which is great both for a first level and for one with a fair number of shifts and dialogue.
* I liked the "Choose-your-own-adventure" idea. I thought it was clever that there were several ways to get to each ending.
* Multiple endings is always a plus.
I'll be honest, this story and challenges really weren't my cup of tea. If you'd like a longer critique or advice, I'm happy to provide it.
I hope to see more from you in the future!