Granted, instead everyone else is vaprorized.
A future version of yourself appears and destroys the orbital-laser-of-doom-shooting-satellite before it shoots the laser, thereby saving both of your lives! Unfortunately, while the majority of the satellite burned up in reentry exactly enough managed to survive to half crush future you, and you are unable to prevent yourself from slowly bleeding out under the wreckage. With the knowledge that this time loop must be closed, and will end in a very painful and prolonged death, you quickly fall into depression and your life around you crumbles. You become a total shut-in, avoiding any contact with any human, and avoid the Internet at all costs, as you're afraid that anything you do will speed up the process towards your death. This obviously is not very logical, but unfortunately your logic died along with the poor crushed body. Ultimately, though, you couldn't escape your fate, as inside your basement a wormhole opens and sucks you, and the entire world, into it. While everything is tossed into different places, you know exactly when and where you land, but at least by now you've learned to accept it. Talps, in comparison, lives a slightly happier life. But only slightly.
I wish I could focus on the DnD material I'm supposed to prepare instead of trawling sites I haven't been to in years.