Corrupt-a-Wish

Granted, but now the universal currency its fruits. and those things no longer grow in trees.

I wish i had the full Minecraft.

Granted. People realize it's pirated, and they take away your account. (Oh and you have a crappy skin)

I wish for purple pumpkins.

granted but they taste terrible
I wish a certain someone would not pick on me each time i release a KS Level.

Granted, but now people don't pick on you, dogs and cats do.

I wish for WORLD PEACE!!! (It doesn't get cheesier that this!)

Granted, but domestic crime skyrockets and your kidneys are harvested by chinese diplomats.


I wish I wish i hadn't killed that fish

Granted, you killed your friends and family. Every single person who fits that description. That's not all, you also killed your pets and your computer. Also, you can't commit suicide because you accidentally turned on the Infinite HP cheat and don't know how to turn it off.

I wish i can haz cheezburger.

Granted, a cat on an invisible bicycle lands on your face. Long story short, your passport photo needs updating.

I wish I had a footlong sub with olives, ham, lettuce, cheese, some sort of ranch dressing, onions, tomato, and wholemeal bread. Oh and hold the poison.

Granted, you recieve a footlong submarine, taken from America and shrunk just for you. It is covered in all of the requested toppings/condiments, but is also filled with the shrunken soldiers inside. You are now being convicted for first degree murder of 45 American soldiers, you horrible cannibal.

I wish I could focus on and finish the level I am working on... Attention span plz.

Granted but you lose focus on everything else and your in trouble.
I wish i had enough aura to buy an Obsidian.

Granted, but it's Dragonadopters currency, not the thing you wanted it to be.

I wish the character limit for sigs was at least 20 chars more than it is right now.

Granted, but instead of being able to use those 20 characters, they are used for imposing lolcat pics into your sig.

I wish I wasn't so lazy.

Granted, but you're still lazy.
I wish for school not being so boring.

Granted, but it's still boring.

I wish people wouldn't give answers to my wishes that aren't funny and/or have no imagination in them.

Granted, but when it is, the topic dies.
I wish for being more creative.

Granted, but you're so creative that no one understands your works.

I wish I could tug on a bug in a rug with a hug from a mug.