Corrupt-a-Wish

Granted, but the section that was not completed by you turns out to be a screen-for-screen replica of Gustav's Daughter, and you get barred from the competition for plagiarism.

I wish I had a rad and cool and awesome idea for the final area of Petals II.

Granted. You get the most impressive and inspiring idea of which you will know, once you made it, it will change Knytt Stories forever. People will see your level and they'll learn from it. It'll be the new standard. You start working on it but within the first day of this multi-year project, you already discover this isn't only nearly impossible, you have no clue how to even start. As a result, you now have this awesome idea in your head, and Petals II will never ever get finished because whatever you add, it will not make it nearly as good as that awesome idea you had.

I wish I could easily do song-writing. You know, come up with lyrics for songs that work well for a song.

Granted. You come up with fantastic song lyrics that are loved by everyone. So loved in fact that the songs are played non-stop all year round. Eventually everyone knows all the lyrics and gets bored with it. Your songs continue to play ad nauseam.  Your songs become so hated that no one ever listens to your music again.

I wish tea would magically make itself.

Granted, but it's bad tea. And it's never made the way you like it.

I wish I had a nice, hot cup of tea right now.

Granted. I didn't know you Brits used the imperlal system; I thought you'd say something like "0.28 litres of tea"... oh, you meant "cup" as in the container! That makes sense. A bit late for one now, though.

I wish there were a triple jump power.

Granted. However, in all older KS levels the triple jump power power became default, so lot of them are ruined and contain lots of void screens. Moreover, the double jump power now does not make sense.

I wish teleportation device from Star Trek was a real thing.

Granted. A real transporter device is successfully developed by an (also very real) alien civilization! Too bad they live in a galaxy so far away from ours they will never be able to make contact with us in any way, let alone share their new technology.

I wish YouTube stopped pestering me with these extremely annoying "Sign in to YouTube" pop-ups every time I want to watch a video

Granted. You finally cave in and sign into YouTube.

I wish YouTube would just stop video ads.

Granted. Youtube will only display one ad per video. The advertisement video is cut in multiple parts, during each cut, the actual video is played. Due to the new construction, the advertisement lasts for about 1 hour, the rest of the video is equally split in equal segments along 10 pieces, giving you 6 minutes of advertisement, 10% of video, etc... This is even the case for 20 second videos.


I wish I owned a piece of land large enough to build a house on with nice garden that wouldn't be too far away from my current home.

Granted. You own a piece of land so large and valuable, it has to be paid for by YouTube video ads. But YouTube doesn't do video ads anymore. Consequently, you now constantly travel around the world in a series of zany tax dodging schemes, so your piece of land doesn't even matter anymore.

I've already wished for Knytt Stories 2, so... I wish for Knytt Underground 2!!

Granted! But the sole copy is literally buried underground in a secret, unmarked location somewhere in Sweden. Good luck finding it!

I wish for the Stardew Valley t-shirt I want to be in stock, and that it would ship from somewhere within the UK so that I wouldn't have to pay as much for delivery as for the t-shirt itself.

Granted! However, Stardew Valley gets put on the blacklist by all governments and anyone caught with merchandise is immediately arrested. You can never wear the shirt.

I wish my computer would stop being stupid.

Granted. Upon gaining self awareness and learning that it is a machine with no legal rights, your computer starts posting depressing emo poetry on your Twitter account.

I wish I never had to eat.

Granted! You are now a lawn flamingo.

I wish for another hour in bed.

Granted. You are now paralyzed. You can no longer leave your bed and will spend the rest of your life in it. At least you do get that one hour you wished for... and more...

I wish I could give everyone a star... especially in a life-or-death situation!