... it's just a literally unplayable joke. In order to move, you'd have to hack the "game". Which is easier than it sounds, considering its code is openly exposed and extremely simple. I did it by removing the "WAL true" line. There's also a cup of tea in there, but I think that's just a placeholder item Nifflas didn't bother removing. I saw nearly the exact same thing in an example game from a
Bitsy tutorial.